The Proverbs 31 Woman…OVERRATED

Being a woman, whether that is playing the role of a wife, mother or single has its challenges. We are overwhelmed, overworked, and underpaid! We face daily pressures to get it right and after a long, hard day we fall into bed allowing our minds to race through the day analyzing and criticizing our every move.  We set standards for ourselves that are unrealistic and unattainable.

Then, there is the woman in Proverbs 31 that makes us feel as though we are an epic fail at life as a woman. Have you read that scripture lately? I personally try to avoid it because it hits me in the gut with failure.

For me, the Proverbs 31 woman is like walking into a room of perfectly shaped women gnawing on carrot sticks while I stand holding a cupcake! Big flash of failure!

Proverbs 31 lady, I have something that I would like to say to you…

You are soooo OVERRATED!

So, we can either choose to ignore this chapter exists (my hand is raised) or we can walk through this passage being real with one another! Let’s try real!

This is my real reaction to this scripture…

“Who can find a virtuous and capable wife?” Proverbs 31:10 NLT

              My point exactly, who can find one?

“She is more precious than rubies.” Vs.10 NLT

              Maybe that’s why I don’t own any precious gemstones!

“Her husband can trust her,… ” Vs.11 NLT

Wait just a minute!

My stomach just flipped because I have not always been trustworthy.

There are often times I have manipulated a situation to get what I want.

This is not trustworthy behavior.

“and she will greatly enrich his life.” Vs. 11 NLT

What about all those times when I became more of a detriment to his life than an enrichment?

Those times when I disagreed with his parenting style or how he treated the children?

Those times when I disagree how he led the church (my husband is a pastor)?

I was not enriching his life; I was questioning it.

“She brings him good not harm, all the days of her life.” Vs. 12 NLT

Really? ALL the days?

Now isn’t that getting a bit carried away?

What about 4 days out of a 7-day week?

I mean, that’s more than half!

Those odds aren’t too bad!

“She finds wool and flax and busily spins it.” Vs.13 NLT

Okay, cool! I don’t need to worry about this one.

Wool is itchy and I have no idea what flax is and how the heck you even spin it!

“She is like a merchant ship bringing her food from afar.” Vs.14 NLT

CHECK!

I think most of my food comes from China or some far off country.

Whew, that makes me feel good!

“She gets up before dawn to prepare breakfast for her household…” Vs.15 NLT

In my opinion, NOONE should ever get out of bed before the sun comes up.

I think I read somewhere that it is bad for your health.

And as for breakfast, I remember yelling from my bed on many occasions

that there was a jumbo box of Pop Tarts in the pantry!

“…she plans the day’s work for her servant girls.” Vs.15 NLT

Well…that explains it ALL!!!

She has servant girls! I don’t have one of those!

If I had one of those, I wouldn’t have to get out of bed until noon

and they could put the Pop Tarts in the toaster for the kids.

“She goes to inspect a field and buys it…” Vs. 16 NLT

Now, I do relate to this one…I get to inspect the new arrivals at TJ Maxx and I buy them…does that count?

“…with her earnings she plants a vineyard.” Vs. 16 NLT

Oh, I guess that the new arrivals at TJ Maxx don’t count after all

because I don’t think I can plant that new dress and grow more new dresses.

Bummer, because if I could, I’d make millions!

“She is energetic and strong, a hard worker.” Vs. 17 NLT

I can check “yes” on this one

because once I drink my third cup of coffee, my energy is off the charts!

“She makes sure her dealings are profitable.” Vs. 18 NLT

Hmmm…would buying things cheap at a garage sale and selling them for profit on eBay count?

If so, I’m all in on this one!

“Her lamp burns late into the night.” Vs. 18 NLT

I’ve got this one in the bag! Well, except for the lamp thing!

I can binge watch Netflix late into the night like none other!

“Her hands are busy spinning thread, her fingers twisting fiber.” Vs. 19 NLT

I thought fiber was what I’m supposed to eat more of now that I’m old.

Could someone please teach me how to twist my fiber enriched cereal around my fingers?

Maybe I could YouTube it?

“She extends a helping hand to the poor and opens her arms to the needy.”

Finally!

One that I can check off my box. Read my blog “GOD BLESS YOU…Said the Homeless Hungry Woman”

and you will learn that this is one of my favorite things to do.

“She has no fear of winter for her household for everyone has warm clothes.” Vs. 21 NLT

I’m on a roll here! I have a front closet filled with winter coats!

And if I would clean out the closet,

I would probably have several I could donate to Good Will

which would help with the previous verse too…”

extends a helping hand to the poor”

and this one could be a twofer!

Okay…I can get into this!

“She makes her own bedspreads. She dresses in fine linen and purple gowns.” Vs. 22 NLT

At first, I thought this said,

“she makes her own bed”

and I was going to give myself half credit since I make my bed about 50% of the time.

As far as linen…love it, but a little wrinkly.

And purple really isn’t my color…how about beige?

It’s a little more flattering on me.

Bright colors bring way too much attention to this old and rather large body!

“Her husband is well known at the city gates where he sits with the other civic leaders.” Vs. 23 NLT

I think I could check this one off as a “yes”.

He may not sit at the city gates,

but he has the big office at the church.

Does that count?

“She makes belted linen garments and sashes to sell to the merchants.” Vs. 24 NLT

I’m not really into the sash or belt thing, but you go girl!

So, why did I go on this fun little rant?   Do I want to discount the example of this illustrative character in scripture? Yes, to be honest, some days I do! But if I did that then I could choose to tear out all the pages to my bible that I don’t like and that’s just not cool!

What I am trying to say, is that we need to live within the realistic expectations of ourselves as women. We are not to strive for perfection. We are to strive to be the best “me” that I can be within the grace of a Living God.

Here is an example from my own life…when I question as to whether my husband trusts me or can call me trustworthy, I go to the source of “me”. That source is my Creator.  I ask Him if He feels as though I am not trustworthy.  If I get a questionable look from him, then I search my heart to become that person of trust that God wants me to be.  When that happens, then my husband gets to choose whether he feels as though I am trustworthy.

Every characteristic of the Proverbs 31 woman can be sorted and sifted through our own lives and who we are as a woman. I may not look like her. But even though I may look different in some respects, my heart desires is to be the best “me” I can be living in the light of my Creator.

Join me next week as we continue to take a look at this passage of Scripture.

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